VodkaMusings

I read a short piece on Feng Sui the other day. I’ve contemplated learning more about it over the years but it always seemed to fall to the bottom of things to do. The article I saw focused on enhancing your romance and/or sex live using the concepts of Feng Sui. It seemed they were providing the most basis…Feng Sui for Dummies on Vodka perhaps. But the bottom line was when you enter a room (any room) look into the furthest back right hand corner. Whatever is there is either helping or hurting your love life. Hmmm, ok, easy enough. Time for a walkthrough!!! Here is a rundown of what is in that space in a couple of rooms I’m in at home and work:
- toilet
- fake plant
- empty bookshelf
- laundry hamper
- water leak, that sometimes grows mold
- litter box
- heavy bag
- dog crate

Perhaps its time for a consultation…..

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The nicest thing anyone has said to me lately: “with you, it’s the fourth of july with fuel air explosives, minus the stale cotton candy”

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Surprising enough I’m not the domestic type. Until recently all of my houseplants needed to be cleaned with Pledge. In an odd attempt to add just one more thing to the list of stuff I’m a complete failure at I decided to grow some houseplants. I dont know why really. I rarely even remember to water myself frequently enough. I bought an Aloe plant cause I figured it would at least come in handy. Its actually doing well and growing little baby Aloes. Then I got some Ivy…cause really who can mess up Ivy? Then, due to my insane success to this point, I decided to grow some garlic. Apparently you can just stick store bought garlic in some dirt and voila….when the leaves start to die off (on their own, not due to lack of water) you can dig up garlic. So I plucked off a couple of cloves to plant. But once I was looking at it I realized I didnt know which side was down. So I just guessed and crammed it in the pot and covered with dirt. Today I noticed a little green spec peeking out. But it was way over on the side instead of where it should be. So I decided to investigate. I slowly pushed away a little dirt at a time to figure out what was going on. My archeological dig discovered that I had, indeed, planted the clove upside down. The thing that blew my mind though was that a gazzillion roots had sprouted and were twisted around the clove so they could grow down. The leaf sprout (on the bottom due to my incompetence) was turned and had grown around the clove and pushed through the roots to finally find the top of the dirt. I just sat there looking at it, having a philosophical moment. I can barely figure out how to get out of bed, get dressed, and get out of the house in the mornings. Much less anything that is productive for my life and general survival. Yet this clove of garlic thats been sitting in my pantry can grow upside down in the dirt and still figure out exactly what its supposed to do and break through the dirt to get sunlight. I never thought I’d be inspired by garlic. But then I dont know if I’m inspired so much as it makes me want to crawl back in bed and pity myself for not having the drive and determination that a garlic clove has.

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And inside!!!

Air….conditioner….broken. Too. hot. to. type.

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Your own antics can be more bothersome to you today than anyone else’s fickle behavior.

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One of the biggest news stories and topics of conversation lately is the price of gas. Everyone is pissed and everyone is complaining. I sold my Jeep a few weeks ago and bought a small car strictly for the gas mileage.

Today I was catching up on some International news after slacking during the long weekend and read some articles on people in breadlines in Egypt and other countries because the cost of a loaf of bread is to much for them to afford.

Wait….WHAT?

What year is this? I’m reading ‘The Pillars of the Earth’ set in the early 1100’s and THEY had bread lines. Why are there people that cant have a staple such as bread? I’m not just bitching, I seriously dont get it.

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….I would publish horoscopes the day before.

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Things have been slow here on the home front. No they havent, thats a lie….but its a great excuse as to why I’ve accomplished nothing and therefore, why I havent blogged. Some have politely assumed that I’ve been silent because my personal life has taken off into some new, unchartered direction with lots of love and exciting events. I find that I love my more delusional friends the most. In all honesty I’ve done nothing exciting. Work is fine. Well, I guess its fine….I seem to show up more frequently than not so I’ve got that going for me. The love life is suckage. The most romantic thing that has happened to me lately is watching that guy on the Office that used to be on the Daily Show sing “take a chance on me” to the blonde chick.

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My thigh was touched today by someone I didnt expect.

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